Today I asked myself a simple question, but I'm still working on the answer. The question was a result of reading one scripture verse that speaks to a reoccurring theme in the Bible. A yucky theme. One we usually gloss over, assuming it could never apply to us, only all those other folks out there who think they are so...something.
But something slowed me down today, drew me in, and grabbed me on either side of my stoic brow between its firm palms. I'm not sure, but it may have been the Holy Spirit. At any rate, it, He looked me straight in the eyes and said, "You, you, you need to meditate on this statement."
And so I have...am...will.
The pride of your heart has deceived you.
Here's what I discovered.
We rarely know right off the bat that we are prideful, arrogant, full of it. Why? Because that very pride has us fooled into thinking we're humble, sweet, submissive, and "who me? prideful? you must have me confused with someone else."
One of the characteristics of pride, beyond the obvious, is that it deceives the carrier. You know. Kind of like that Carly Simon song, You're So Vain...I bet you thought this song was about cha.... Pride gets us all confused about what's real, what's genuine.
So today I'm asking myself a few gut-wrenching questions so I can get to the bottom of this. You see, I don't want to be duped by my own pride. I want to live a genuine, honest, transparent life. And I certainly don't want to play the fool, especially because of my own pride.
I'm asking myself if I've been fooled by my own puffed up ego, my own self-sufficiency, and my own standard of right and wrong in any of these areas:
- Do I try to handle some things on my own, never asking God for help? Yup.
- Have I been pleased as punch with myself over a recent accomplishment? nod up and down.
- Do I sometimes tune out certain lessons, devotionals, sermons, even Scripture passages because I've already got that one down pat? Mmm humm.
- Do I start formulating my especially well-crafted and wise answers to other people's arguments, questions, or points while they are still expressing them to me? Hmmm.
- Am I confident in my faith, more because I have such great faith than because I have a great God? I'll have to get back to you on that one.
- Do I often tell God, in maybe not quite these same words, just how blessed He is to have me? Especially considering all the attention He has to give to some other people who just don't seem to have the same learning curve I do? Oh boy.
Well, let me crawl out from under my desk now so I can tie this stinking post up all sweet and such. Ahem.
Look Here's the thing. The only one my pride fools is me. Sure, sometimes my prideful attitude even manages to fool others, but only for a little while.Then they see the real me peaking through the facade my pride has crafted and they're no longer duped. Just me. I'm left with egg on my face...and I don't even know it. But I want to know it, so I can get it off!
And so I'm pondering these things today. And I'm trying to give myself honest answers and confront my sin head on.
How do you go about confronting sin in your own life? How do you hold the mirror up to your life, look in it honestly, and deal with what you see?
Labels: Just Me and Thee