I get sick every Sunday morning. I know! That's crazy, right? But ever since I began teaching the high school girls' Sunday school class, I truly feel sick every Sunday morning as I prepare to leave for church.
I won't go into the details about my sickness. Suffice it to say that my particular variety of illness keeps me near the restroom and permits me to eat a hearty lunch when all is said and done.
So why do I get sick every Sunday morning? Because teaching teenaged girls is way, way, way out of my comfort zone. And I'm nervous as all get out each and every weekend about sitting down with those "cute-as-a-button" girls and teaching them a simple lesson from the Bible.
Truth is, these are lovely girls. They are varied in ages and interests and backgrounds, but they are every single one of them a pure delight. Still...I get nervous.
I've always loved teaching adult women. I can count on adult women to come to class somewhat pleased to be there. They look at me when I speak and they speak my same language. I don't have to worry about using terminology or illustrations that date me.
But teen girls are another matter all together. They giggle at things I say and I wonder if I used some word incorrectly. They stare at me as though I'm speaking Russian. They scribble on pieces of paper while I speak about things which are not even worthy of notes, much less diagrams. This puzzles me. They puzzle me.
And yet, as the weeks have passed, I have grown to love these girls tremendously. And so, now, even while I run to the bathroom yet again and again on Sunday mornings, I actually look forward to seeing Alanna and Maddie and Mandy and Randee and TeTe and Kelsey and Jenna and Caitlin and whoever else may show up.
Here's the thing. Teaching these girls makes me sick. It really does. Not because I don't like them, but because I do. Because I want so badly to be good for them, to reach them, to connect, to show them Jesus. I want to ignite in them a pure and unbridled passion for God and the things of God, primarily His Word. I want, each and every Sunday morning, to give them a taste of the divine, so that they search it out for themselves, never settling for the mundane or worldly.
God has called me, at least for this season in my life, to invest in this handful of high school girls. And this calling scares the living daylight out of me. But I count it an honor, a privilege, a high calling. I just want to do it well. And so, for now, I'm ok with getting a little sick every Sunday morning. They are worth it. And He is worth it.
Has God called you to a ministry that is bigger than you? Has He challenged you to walk a new path? Has He called you to step out of your comfort zone and into the hot spot? Hey! You're not alone. And, truth be told, there's no better place to be. Because this I know: He's there with us. He's just looking for empty vessels to carry His glory into any and every arena you can imagine. He'll pour in all you need to get the job done, and He'll work mightily through you.
But you might need to stick close to a bathroom...just in case.
Labels: anxiety, courage, discipleship, ministry